Description

"My Apocalypse Loadout" Survival Crewneck - Starter Tier Gear

€47,99 EUR
Taxes included.
S / Ash

Video games promised you assault rifles and night vision goggles. Reality handed you a roll of duct tape, a single can of protein, and a stick you found on the ground. This instructional garment displays the honest inventory of the modern survivor. It proudly asserts that while your gear score might be low, your spirit (and your stick) is ready for action. Wear this to signal that you have mastered the art of making do with absolutely nothing—because "It's not much, but it's mine" is the new national anthem.

  • Comfort Buff: Soft fleece interior provides critical warmth, which is the only luxury you have left since you don't have a jacket in your loadout.

  • Structural Integrity: Durable stitching that holds up significantly better than the duct tape in your inventory.

  • Inventory Check: High-visibility graphic allows for a quick gear audit: Beans? Check. Tape? Check. Stick? Check.

  • Agility Build: Relaxed fit ensures you can swing that stick with maximum velocity when the time comes.

  • Threat Reduction: The tagline lowers your profile, ensuring bandits won't waste their precious ammo trying to rob you of your beans.



Product features
- Medium-heavy 50/50 cotton-poly blend (8.0 oz/yd²) for balanced warmth and durability
- Classic crewneck with ribbed collar and double-needle stitching for long-lasting shape
- Tubular knit (no side seams) for a smooth, waste-reducing silhouette
- DTG prints on body with optional embroidery placements (left/center chest, wrists) and DTF inner neck labels
- OEKO-TEX dyes and US Cotton Trust Protocol—safety- and sustainability-minded materials

Care instructions
- Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)
- Non-chlorine: bleach as needed
- Tumble dry: low heat
- Do not iron
- Do not dryclean

The "Curriculum" Approach

Incoming Resupply Protocols

We print every piece of gear on-demand to prevent waste—because resource management is key to survival.

  • Mobilization Time: Please allow 2-5 days for us to manufacture your supplies at our nearest stronghold.
  • Transit: Once deployed, standard shipping typically takes 3-5 business days (depending on the status of the local infrastructure).
  • Tracking: You will receive a tracking link as soon as your loot drop is airborne. Watch your inbox.

Mission Assurance Guarantee

We strive for 100% mission success, but sometimes supply drops go wrong.

  • Damaged Goods: If your gear arrives damaged, misprinted, or infected, send us a photo within 30 days. We will deploy a replacement immediately—no cost, no questions.
  • Wrong Size: Did you overestimate your stats? It happens. Contact support, and we'll help sort out your loadout.
  • Support Comms: Our bunker staff is on standby to ensure you are equipped properly. Do not hesitate to signal us.

Built to Last (Without Ruining What's Left)

Survival isn't just about bunkers; it's about preserving what we have.

  • Zero Waste: We use a made-to-order model. No warehouses full of unsold stock ending up in landfills. We only make what you actually need.
  • Ethical Supply: Our apparel is produced using OEKO-TEX certified dyes and sourced via the US Cotton Trust Protocol.
  • Durability: We choose materials (ring-spun cotton, heavy blends) designed to survive the wash cycle and the wasteland.

Educational Entertainment for the End Times

You know us from the simulations. Survival Curriculum is dedicated to turning terrifying fictional scenarios—from zombies to nuclear winter—into actionable, science-based survival skills.

  • Support the Research: Every piece of gear you buy directly funds the research and animation for our next YouTube simulation.
  • Join the Ranks: Wearing this gear signals to other survivors that you know Rule #1 (Cardio) and you have a plan.

Stay safe, stay prepared, and thanks for funding the bunker.